What If I Lose Her
by Saphire Ravven8
Summary: Rated for use of the sword that means crap. Just a little oneshot set during The Assault after Adam goes to the Helix & Shal&Bren are attacked. Bren's POV, his thoughts, etc after Shal's fall. Let me know if rating needs upping. Don't report pls.


Title: What If I Lose Her

Disclaimer: I own nothing....too bad...

Summary: Brennan's tidal wave of thoughts and emotions after Shal gets blown off the second floor during S3 finale called um... "The Assault"...I think that was the name...whatever... Brennan's POV....

A/N: Quick liddle one shot that I thought up in a moment of boredom. Also includes the time between when Bren got to Shal's side after she fell to the floor after the explosion caused by that rocket-thing and how long it REALLY took her to regain consciousness. I mean, be realistic, nobody gets up that fast after being blown off a second floor, not even our favorite feral. So, this is the shit they should've shown from Brennan's POV as he prays that is love isn't dead.

The Dominion's minions (A/N: heh...that rhymes...Dude, I'm such a dork....) burst through the doors and I took a bullet in the shoulder. Shit that hurt. Shit. Damn these guys are impenetrable. I can't get a shot in at 'em. That sucks. How the hell are we gonna get out of here? We can't die now. I love her and she knows it now. I can't die now, we just found each other again, we finally know the truth about each other's feelings, why does it have to end now?

No. No way. I won't let this happen. We're getting the hell out of here and we're going to save Jesse and Lexa and the Dominion can just kiss my nicely tanned ass. I'm Brennan Mulwray, dammit, and I refuse to die here today and I'm not letting her die either. We're getting the hell out of this place with our lives. That's just it.

Shalimar has grabbed what I assume to be what's left of a door and uses it to shield us from their bullets as we run up the stairs to fight our way to the Helix and Adam. She throws down our make-shift shield as we duck behind the little-half-wall of the cat walk and I breathe hard, unable to get at least to my knees. God this sucks, I'm such a wuss. I take a bullet and I can't even get up off my ass. I'm such a goddamn pussy. What the hell's wrong with me? I took a damn bullet, that doesn't make me a pussy. That makes me a goddamn target!

Shalimar, golden-blonde curls framing her face and hanging about her neck and shoulders, so beautiful, even under these circumstances, crawls beneath a fallen beam to the other side and closer to the Helix and turns to yell back at me to hurry.

That's when it happened. A Dominion agent fires a missile at us and she flies over the wall to the floor below and lands with a sickening thud and lays still.

"SHAL!!!!" I scream and form a tesla coil in my hand as I rise to my feet. I see several agents creeping towards her, my love, utterly still, upon the ground. NO! I won't let them touch her!!! I've failed her once already! I will keep her safe! Unless...

No Brennan! Bad train of thought! She's okay, she's just unconscious, probably hit her head. She's strong, Shal's strong, she can survive anything, even a fall like that...God, she fell so hard and I couldn't stop it....I failed her... Oh God, I failed her... She could be seriously hurt... Oh God... Shalimar...Okay, Brennan, get a damn grip. You have to stop them from getting her! Protect the girl you love, moron! Think! Get with the damn program dumbass! SAVE HER!!

I search around rapidly with my eyes and spot the bright green glowing cylinder that is the heart of Sanctuary's power and with very little hesitation, fire my tesla coil at it, vaporizing those bastards, but breaching the substance and setting off alarms that whistle...no scream...in my ears as I race down the desecrated stairs to my fallen love, so many thoughts playing through my head that I feel like I'm going in slow motion, willing myself to get to her faster.

'_Oh God, she's dead. What am I gonna do without her? I can't live without her. She's my everything. I need her more than anyone else in the world. I can't lose her. Not after Emma and all this bullshit with Adam. She's my rock. My one and only port in the storm. I love her more than life itself. She's always been the only woman for me. How could I've been so stupid? Why didn't I tell her before? God, I'm so selfish! I was playing with her!! I'm such a fool!!! I could very well lose her tonight, I may have lost her already and I spent the last several months _playing_ with her, toying with both our emotions!!! I can't lose her, not now. I need her so much. Oh God what if I lose her tonight? Here, in this place where we've spent the last several years together? The place that's become my home. The place where we found each other. She can't be dead, please God, not Shalimar. She's the heart of this team and me. Please, please God, don't take her. Please, not her.'_

And then I'm at her side, falling beside her upon my knees and cradling her head in my arms, a single tear running a ragged course down my cheeks and falling from my chin to her cheek. "Shal! Come on Shal, wake up! Please, Shal, please wake up." I plead with her over and over. I feel for a heart beat and for a split second that seemed to last and eternity, I felt nothing. Oh God_, no. Please, _I'll do anything, no_..._I love her_. Please God, no..._ And then comes a slight pressure beneath my finger tips as her blood pumped doggedly on through her body. A sigh of relief escapes my tense body at the brilliant realization that she's alive. My love, my only one, is alive.

"Shal, baby, please. Come on, baby, wake up. Wake up for me Shal. Baby please," tears form in my eyes as she stirs and a soft moan of pain escapes her perfect lips and yet she does not wake. "Shalimar, please hear me. We have to get out of here. This place is gonna blow. Come on baby, wake up. Open those beautiful green eyes for me, come on, you can do this."

She stirs again, eyelids fluttering, fighting to open. She groans and moves in my arms. Her eyes flicker open and she blinks several times to clear her vision. I hug her to me, so afraid and yet so relieved. She's back. I thought I lost her.

"Come on Shal, you okay? We've gotta get out of here." I gently help her to her feet, wrap an arm around her waist and she does the same and we help each other to the Helix and to Adam, who's waiting and eyes us with concern as he starts the engine, frowning at the blood seeping from the bullet wound in my shoulder.

We blast past the Dominions choppers and are gone into the deepening night sky to rescue our friends and stop the Dominion for good, starting with that Creator guy that everyone's so hyped up about. Those bastards are going down. I won't let them get away with hurting her. Not my girl, my precious feral. My Shalimar.

**THE END**

A/N: See, quick little one shot that I wrote at nearly one in the morning, praying that I wouldn't get caught...Dude, that'd suck...anyways, Review and tell me what you think. Let me know if Brennan was a bit too OOC. Kay, thanks, loads of love to you all!! Saph


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